Friday, July 20, 2012

Sunday New York Times announces a "commitment ceremony"

I am not a regular Sunday NY Times reader. And when I do read it, it's usually a handful of sections, not including "Sunday Styles."  But last Sunday I was on a cross country flight and spent more time than usual perusing the paper.  I am periodically curious about the number of same-sex wedding announcements, so late in the flight I turned to that section of the paper.

First I marveled, again, at the old-fashioned convention of the contents of these announcements, and the sheer class bias in them.  Every person a college graduate, with parents of various distinction. But I read on, including the three gay male couples whose announcements were, for better and/or for worse, indistinguishable from the others.

But then...a deviation so momentous I had to read and reread it to believe my eyes.  Emily Brouwer and Anna Le Mon, complete with smiling faces, "affirmed their partnership in a commitment ceremony ceremony" in San Francisco, in a service led by a friend.  Wow and double wow!  The other NYT conventions were complied with precisely.  College degrees. Jobs. Parents.  I don't know when "commitment ceremonies" began gracing the NY Times Sunday announcements, so this may be old news to some.  But to me it was actually a way I could see myself on this very page, something I have never imagined.

I have never wanted to take commitment out of marriage...only the law and the name.  A public affirmation of commitment is just the sort of statement I admire, a way or drawing together family and friends to celebrate love.

If anyone knows when the Times included the first of these, I'd love to know.

7 comments:

Diane said...

It was in 2002 that the NYT began accepting and publishing same-sex wedding announcements, and from the beginning their policy applied to both legal (only civil unions at the time) and symbolic ceremonies.
http://video.nytimes.com/video/2009/09/12/fashion/weddings/1247464407865/vows-state-of-the-unions.html?ref=samesexmarriage

I have a distinct memory of Tom Stoddard's wedding being featured in the Vows column (not technically a wedding announcement, according to the Times' odd taxonomy), but I can't seem to find it online.

Diane said...

To clarify -- Stoddard was married in 1993, so this would have been well before the Times changed its policy, which is why it's noteworthy in this context.

Tim said...

The Times has included commitment ceremonies in its announcements since 2002:

http://articles.courant.com/2002-08-20/features/0208200606_1_announcements-of-same-sex-commitment-commitment-ceremonies-ceremony-announcements

Nancy Polikoff said...

So now I wonder if the NY Times will publish commitment ceremonies of different-sex couples!

Nancy Polikoff said...

As for the Tom Stoddard announcement, I definitely do not remember that and I would love to see it....

Diane said...

After much searching, I found the Tom Stoddard NYT wedding article. It wasn't in the Vows column as I (mis)remembered -- but it was in the Style section! Here's the link -- http://www.nytimes.com/1993/11/27/style/chronicle-662793.html?scp=2&sq=%22thomas+stoddard%22&st=nyt

Tom was one of my profs at NYU Law, and a hero.

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